I WANT YOU TO RECEIVE ALL THE LOVE I ACHE TO GIVE YOU!

YOU WILL NEVER KNOW HOW MUCH LOVE I WILL GIVE YOU...

Unless You Let me Live!!!!

Let ME LIVE AND GIVE YOU SMILES AND HUGGY WUVS....

and TICKLE YOUR TOES!

AND DANCE MY HEART OUT AND SING YOU NEW SONGS YOU HAVE YET TO KNOW!

GREAT MEETING UP MY BABYSITTER WHO CARED FOR ME & LOVED ME!

April 16, 2013

Today going through all settings of my blogs on my blogger draftboard, something I have not had Internet air time to do regularly in quite a long time...

I found this stored in "DRAFTS" which I am certain I meant to POST or PUBLISH then but clicked the wrong thing by mistake & it merely saved and did not post ...

I had written in October 2009 just before we in obedience left our Charlotte North Carolina home for my last time.

So here it is I share the joy of God placing those in my path from my past who were gentle, loving and kind:

May God Bless you!
Amen


October 2009
No one can be used by GOD if they are ashamed of who they are, or more importantly, who they once were!

Jesus Christ himself is the only human being who can never say:  "I was once lost, but now am found.. was blind and now I see!"

And each of us humans ever born or to be born on earth of a woman, cannot ever Sing from the Mountaintops of their heart: "Look what the Lord has Done!"

If they are ashamed of who GOD made them, and who & how HE has formed them through life!

If each is created by GOD and For GOD in HIS own image & since before we were created HE KNEW US!  So how is it that so many are ashamed of who they are...  They do not realize in essence they are saying GOD is not honorable by failing to believe that not all things...  that not all people GOD MADE GOOD....  and HE looked at all of us and HE is pleased with us, HIS creation and cannot cease Loving us without ceasing being Himself!

 I was graciously given by GOD the opportunity my Billy the good memories of you!  And how I never ever understood where you would magically appear from, and I would cry when you left...

You in my small childhood was that only person in my entire life who was consistently kind and loving

All of the neighborhood children, especially Claudia, Andy, Michael, Sally, and Beau Billeaud, and even my brothers, saw me as a freak and an appropriate target for their cruelty.

I recall these children, with Gandolphi boys, burying a cat alive with its head above ground and running over it with a lawn mower.

That to them was entertainment!  If I had ever understood, under 10 years old that you & Debbie were sisters and you were Mr Frank's Daughters...

I would have been knocking on your door multiple times a day!  I have good memories of Debbie, but Bonnie, something about you was always magical....

Not magic like Mary Poppins or Cinderella, but I immediately felt and still feel a deep spiritual connection.  At 7 years old, I felt GOD with me whenever you were with me!  Not that HE left me when you left.  I just new you were a special gift from HIM & so  I used to cry and scream whenever you left!

You loved me, my parents did not, and still today they do not know how to love or forgive themselves.  I want nothing more than to have a normal father/mother-daughter & father-inlaw/mother-in-law   son in law relationship.

But it is in their court.  They are not capable.

My Darling leads our prayers at every meal, that GOD will draw them to Himself, that they return to the Holy Mass, going to confession first and receive forgiveness and healing.

My heart has forgiven them as far back as when you babysat, but no one knows what goes on behind closed doors.

But see a normal relationship is not possible with them, because since they insist that they have done no wrong ever ever...

They set themselves up for even graver sin, greater acts of cruelty against themselves, and anyone who foolishly gives them access to over & over repeat their terrible behavior, then justify it!

I know, I am to love & honor my parents!  I do!  Just from afar!  They have an email address & they have been sent links to my blogs!   I will be going on your blog..  I wanted to respond to what you wrote me personally first.

Have you been able to look at mine yet?

Billy & I took a class last Saturday.  We will soon be a nonprofit 501(C)(3)

We want to travel the country as he sets up his carpentry teaching program that works in all states.  States have no money for this, and due to politics the only way to accomplish what GOD has instructed him/us is to accept donations!

Your eyes...  seeing you that night in the book store... YOUR EYES SPARKLE!  

I told my Billy that looking into your eyes, I could then, and as I remember your face & your eyes I See the Eyes of Jesus & Mary!  And my heart is on FIRE!

Billy is calling me for breakfast!  After telling him all I did, he would be happy to see you again, but not at the mall...  and with your husband too!   It would be fun!

And if we do not get together soon, we may not get to...  we will be moved by the Lord very quickly...  HE has us emptying our house!   Giving things away!

I am talented at my embroidery...  I would like to give you a gift!!!

I cannot send through Internet!

I hope to hear from you!! 

And to see you again with your husband & mine!

I am so BLESSED to see you again & have my eyes opened!

Love & Blessings!

EstherStephanada!

On Wed, Oct 14, 2009 at 9:19 AM, Bonnie  wrote:

Although I am sorry that it opened some wounds that made you feel
uncomfortable, I'm really glad that I saw you and your husband the other day
at the store.  It is wonderful to see how the Lord has brought you out from
under the difficulties you have experienced in your past. What a great
testimony of His love, gentleness, and mercy.

Please let your husband know that I would have talked to the two of you
longer had I not been working.  My boss is very determined that we as
employees don't socialize with the customers at the store. I would have
never looked into your beautiful eyes and told you who I was had I not
wanted to speak to you.

For now honey, lets keep in touch by email as with my boss's instructions on
conversing with customers for long periods of time, my irregular work
schedule as well as the long hours at the store it seems the best way to do
so right now.

As an intercessor in prayer I have a blog that you might like to check out
also. http://prayerwarrior-lm.blogspot.com/

I will continue to pray for you and your dear husband as well as for your
family.  Stephanie, I know that your heart is hurting but honey, stay
focused and look to God Our Heavenly Father and He will give you the peace
and rest that you need.

Keep in touch honey,

As always, Bonnie

COMMON ABUNDANT WASTE EVEN IN CHURCHES & MINISTRY...Priests for LIFE Larry Jones' FEED the CHILDREN & EVEN JESSIE DUPLANIS USES FULL CLASS POSTAGE!

On Thu, Oct 1, 2009 at 4:29 PM

My husband & I have alays been givers.  Jesus made it the responsibility to each and every sower...Each Giver:  The responsibility of knowing they are planting in good soil!

And what makes a church fertile ground for planting is not only the actual work or purpose of the work they do!

We know that JESUS CARES ABOUT WASTE!!

If HE DID NOT HE would not have forced those tired weary apostles...PICK UP THE FRAGMENTS!

When big time Ministries taking in billions of dollars from generous tithers like you & us, they are taking on the responsibility to prayerfully use our seed wisely!

The above is only one example of the many letters phone calls my husband & I have made to all three of these Ministries whose causes are good....  Though THEY ARE WASTING ABUNDANTLY!!!!

Feed the Children takes in about a BILLION a year....  so they no different than these other two do not care how some is spent and the rest is wasted!

Charity Navigator prior to now {NOTICE THEY ARE ALSO IN THIS WINDOW} apparently has never seen with their own eyeballs all the full posstage stamps used on every mailing that has ever come to our house from FEED the Children!

My husband once called their headquarters and actually spoke to Larry Jones secretary!!  They did not take our complaint seriously or even politely!

We contine to write on each piece of mail we receive from them>> "return to sender- Non-Profits rich enough to use First class stamps will not get our money to take us off mailing lists!  But the First class requests for our money keep coming!!!

We are not even touching salaries! Look at the postage amount on the envelopes you receive!!!   Any large non-profit can qualify for non-profit bulk rate mailing!

Whether they save only 10 cents or 25 cents per envelope times that by the number of people on their mailing lists!!!

Check out Charity Navigator  http://www.charitynavigator.org/   They give Priests for Life only 2 stars for their efficiency!

JDM whose primary goal is teaching about sowing and reaping and mishandling seed not only often use First class stamps>>>>  We did not even receive an aknowledgement for a non-monetary hand-made gifts sent to Jessie and Cathy and those would be grandchildren they so despirately want!

We realize someone working for them, stole the handmade embroideries we sent!!

We realize that therefore How much money in DOLLARS or millions of dollars being skimmed, not reported and therefore wasted & stolen!!

Jessie himself says look at the fruit s of the labors of the ministries you sow into and ask each ministry are the ministry itself tithing & giving offerings to other ministries>>  for if they are not>>  they are dry bones & your seed will take LONG LONG TIME to grow up!

How many more hungry mouths can be fed???  How many single pregnant mothers can be supported to carry their babies to term???  How much more TV air time can be bought and souls saved???

Just with the difference they are wasting Giving to the Post Office extra is not paying for services rendered!!!!

THE HEART of GOD is CRYING OUT IN PAIN that NO ONE CARES about HIS RESCOURCES WASTED as other HIS little ones continues Suffering who would not if all these big ministries STARTED STAMPING OUT WASTE>>>>  USE ONLY NON-PROFIT STAMPS!!

I encourage all of you to write any charity , Ministry or non-profit you support who you receive mail that does NOT use Non-Prifit postage to change their habits IMEDIATELY or NO LONGER SUPPORT THEM!

Big corporations have stockholders who each have a vote on these kind of issues that their invistments are used wisely!

But churches and non-profits assume their money will always keep coming!  And so well we will just get more money>>>  Never caring how it is spent!

But people of GOD YOU BETTER CARE HOW THEY SPEND IT>>>  FOR SEED PLANTED into Wasteful ground will not produce abundantly!!!  Certainly at best it will remain dormant>>>

It is the sowers responsibility to make these big churches and ministries accountable for their spending!!

But most importantlly their WASTE!!!

Otherwise they will HAPPILY Misspend and waste your hard earned seed money as long as we are stupid enough to keep sending it and not demanding that they rectify their waste and produce more that the Harvests of ALL including you & I BE MORE ABUNDANT>>>

Our harvests are often thrown out with the weeds if we do not sift the wheat from the waste>> the WEEDS!

Jessie says:  "Your harvest is in your fragments" as he brags on how he watches over GOD's money>>

and teaches about mishandling seed>>>  They mishandle seed just as the rest>>>  They will be held to an even higher account, for that is what he preaches & teaches about!

Mr & Mrs William Gustavson encouraging you to act like stockholders and make all churches & ministries you give to accountable!!

EstherStephanada & Billy-Jacob>>> We never take NO for an answer and let no man go without trying to be a blessing!!